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Currently obsessed with the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Lost and pop culture

Okay, so there’s not really a Tony Stark trailer. But James Gunn did release a poster of the fake movie the other day, starring Nathan Fillion starring as Simon Williams starring as Tony Stark.

TONY STARK
TONY STARK

A few months back, somebody released some pictures of a movie theater with a bunch of Simon Williams posters evident, part of an awesome “Simon Williams Film Fest.” It was supposed to be a part of the Guardians of the Galaxy 2 movie, but all the Simon Williams scenes were cut. I also put out an article about some scenes that may have been part of that Tony Stark movie. I’m revisiting that, right now.

Let's all go to the lobby
Let's all go to the lobby

I would love for James Gunn to put out a Marvel One-Shot of the trailer for the Tony Stark movie for release with the Guardians 2 Blu-Ray. And it would have to star Nathan Fillion starring as Simon Williams starring as Tony Stark. My quotes are courtesy of IMDB.com.

Crom!
Crom!

It would have to start out with the familiar feedback of Black Sabbath’s Iron Man.

It’s the scene from the original Iron Man with Tony and a Happy-esque actor talking with WHIH Newsfront Anchor Christine Everhart (I think it’s in her character to play herself in the feature Tony Stark movie) about his arms-dealing. During the voice over, the movie production logo plays on screen like the Marvel one.

DaVinci Code
DaVinci Code

Christine Everheart: You've been called the Da Vinci of our time. What do you say to that?

Tony Stark: Absolutely ridiculous. I don't paint.

Christine Everheart: And what do you say to your other nickname, the Merchant of Death?

Tony Stark: That's not bad.

Tony holding his arms to the side, with the wind and destruction of the Jericho missile.

Wooooosh
Wooooosh

Tony Stark: They say that the best weapon is the one you never have to fire. I respectfully disagree. I prefer the weapon you only have to fire once. That's how Dad did it, that's how America does it, and it's worked out pretty well so far.

A whole bunch of Iron Man action shots, Tony looking productive building Iron Man suits...

The Mechanic
The Mechanic

followed by Tony at the Press Conference saying:

American burger
American burger

Tony Stark: The truth is...

[puts cards down]

Tony Stark: I am Iron Man.

Then the song goes into full effect.

You see New York, during the Battle against the Chitauri. A bunch of actors in Avengers costumes, the HUD display over Nathan Fillion’s face.

House Party Protocol
House Party Protocol

Tony Stark: I'm bringing the party to you.

[Stark in his Iron Man armor leads the monstrous Leviathan into view, heading toward the rest of the Avengers]

Natasha Romanoff: I - I don't see how that's a party.

Then there’s the familiar shot of all the Avengers together in a circle, looking like a bunch of bad-asses.

Assemble!
Assemble!

Switches to Tony at the Congressional Meetings:

In prostitution? Of course not!
In prostitution? Of course not!

Senator Stern: My priority is to get the Iron Man weapon turned over to the people of the United States of America.

Tony Stark: Well, you can forget it. I am Iron Man. The suit and I are one. To turn over the Iron Man suit would be to turn over myself, which is tantamount to indentured servitude or prostitution, depending on what state you're in. You can't have it…. I've successfully privatized world peace.

A couple of shots with Captain America (played by John Krasinski), who by the time the movie comes out, is a wanted fugitive, with this movie being a PR stunt against him and his Secret Avengers.

Star Spangled man
Star Spangled man

Steve Rogers: Big man in a suit of armor. Take that off, what are you?

Tony Stark: Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist.

He killed my mom
He killed my mom

The two men fighting ala Civil War.

Different scenes from Tony’s life play out on screen with different actors:

Peed in the suit
Peed in the suit

Tony Stark: I always say, "Keep your friends rich and your enemies rich, and wait to find out which is which."

Virginia 'Pepper' Potts (AKA the Love Interest of the Movie): Tony, you know that I would help you with anything, but I cannot help you if you're going to start all this again.

Tony Stark: I tried to create a suit of armor around the world... but I created something terrible.

Homework
Homework

And the trailer ends with this exchange:

Cheap Trick
Cheap Trick

Woman on Fire: Is that all you've got? A cheap trick and a cheesy one-liner?

Tony Stark: Sweetheart, that could be the name of my autobiography.

[blows her up]

Boom.
Boom.

Boom. Tony Stark. Directed by Iain McFadyen. Coming Soon.

I would need multiple posters released as well as a Hot Toys Iron Man statue, but with Nathan Fillion’s face instead of Robert Downey Jr’s.

I am Iron Man
I am Iron Man

Poll

Would you watch this trailer?

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