#VinDiesel is a very busy man these days. When he's not taking care of his "family" in the #FastAndFurious franchise, he's reviving one of his favorite characters: #Riddick, that made a comeback back in 2013. This time around, he's revived one of his other fan-favorite characters: Xander Cage, a character we haven't seen since it's debut in 2002, when Diesel and director Rob Cohen were still riding the blockbuster success of The Fast and The Furious. It got a sequel, with Ice Cube taking Diesel's place and a whole government revolution taking over the U.S of A, in the style of gangsta rap, mind you.
We're in 2017 and comebacks is mostly what Hollywood is all about, so when it was announced Diesel would be returning to play the world's most radical anti-hero, the Internet broke for a few moments.
To many (including yours truly), #xXx is a guilty pleasure of sorts, being everything a James Bond movie would be if he wasn't so damn classy. This was the people's spy and we loved it, flaws and all!
Xander Cage Lives
But what made Xander Cage return? Well, apparently after being playing dead for so long, he is tracked down by the NSA to retrieve a deadly device called "Pandora's Box", able to control and crash satellites around the world, racing against a group of villains lead by Xiang (Donnie Yen). Because the other team is composed of four radically talented bad guys, Cage brings along his own team of anti-heroes, just so to make things right.
This third entry of xXx promised to be a whole lot crazier than any of its entries before and it delivered in such a stylish fashion, that you're bound to forgive most of the mistakes it does throughout this wild, wild adventure.
It's amazing how all the mindless action scenes stick together and are perfectly capable to own it like there is an actually possibility to do all those things in the real world. Laughable even. But in the back of your mind, there's a sense of pleasure, very much of the guilty kind and that makes this movie a hard one to hate.
Being Awesome, One Action Scene At A Time
Between all the cool fight scenes, most of them courtesy of the amazing martial artist actor Donnie Yen, who manages to steal the show every time he's on camera, and how the rest of the cast fight against the world, underneath lies a story that wasn't exactly written to make you think; it was made for you to have fun. While this isn't an entirely bad thing, it's too easy to spot the real bad guys, which makes all these action scenes, probably set to distract us from what's actually happening, ineffective.
But xXx: Return of Xander Cage wasn't made to think, it was made for thrills and that it does very, very well.
Mind you, the movie does have a fair share of problems, but curiously, this is a very particular case of it being the consequence of a society that is glued to their smartphones and apps every breathing moment.
Be it the irritating EDM music, that at the turn of every scene is blasted at an equally irritating volume, the introduction cards, pretending like it's some kind of comic-book movie or the continuous punchlines, ripped off the first film, for "nostalgia" purposes, forcefully put into the script; you'd be surprised how nobody on that set cared to mention it might be a little too much.
You've Just Entered The Xander Zone
Out of all of the quotes, that one did not make its way into the film, for reasons that are beyond me. But I suppose it'd be a bit too meta, since the entire movie is representative of that phrase and nobody wanted to state the obvious.
On a different note, while Vin Diesel may be playing the lead, there is plenty of room for his female counterparts, as Deepika Padukone, Ruby Rose and Nina Dobrev all play the badass girls, possibly showing us what a female lead xXx would look like, since there have been rumors in the past of such.
All in all, xXx: Return of Xander Cage isn't a bad movie. It has a lot of terrible things, but lets be honest: You're there to sit down and kick back to see some crazy stuff happen on-screen, preferably in 3D IMAxXx. So, for the sake of this argument, let the madness distract you from the flaws and go watch this movie. Just don't expect to leave the theater with a whole new take on life. Except if that life involves skateboards and explosions, maybe then.
Did you see xXx: Return of Xander Cage? What did you think? Let me know in the comments below!